Sadness makes me feel the most pain

I think what upsets me the most whenever I’m crying is knowing that this won't be the last time I’ll cry. There will be another time my chest feels heavy and I feel like I’ve lost control of my self once again. The feeling of being sad will never go away forever. It might be gone temporarily, but when you care the feeling will always be back. When you give yourself over, the rush of disappointment whenever your feelings have been hurt or taken for granted will still come. 

I always feel like I’m being taken for granted. Sometimes I feel like I’m not even worth it because another human being keeps hurting me without even noticing it. If they don’t see how much they’ve been hurting me even though I keep trying to tell them...are my thoughts even important?

I also don’t get why it feels like a vacuum is trying to suck out my lungs. Why it feels like I can’t breathe so I gasp between each cry for help. Why the pain is so physical when really it’s just mental. How my body shrinks itself because my mind doesn’t wanna be seen.

 It sucks man. It sucks to always hurt.